Empathy Builder
Practice perspective-taking exercises
Empathy is trainable. These structured exercises help you step into someone else's shoes—not to agree, but to understand.
What pressures, constraints, or circumstances might they be dealing with that you can't see?
Think about workload, personal life, health, past experiences, or organizational pressures.
What emotions might they be experiencing in this situation?
Go beyond surface emotions. Under anger there's often fear; under withdrawal there's often hurt.
What do they most need right now? (Safety, validation, autonomy, respect, connection?)
Everyone is trying to meet a need. Their behavior is their strategy, even if it's a bad one.
What story might they be telling themselves about this situation?
We all have internal narratives. Their story about what happened may be very different from yours.
What's the most generous interpretation of their behavior?
This doesn't mean excusing harm. It means considering they might not have intended the impact.